✔ Backed by: National Institute on Aging (NIA) · ARCH National Respite Network · Administration for Community Living (ACL) · U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) · Medicare.gov. Each fact links to its source, and the full list is at the bottom of this post.
Caring for someone you love is meaningful work. It can also wear you down. Maybe you help a parent with memory loss, a spouse after a stroke, or an adult child with a disability. Days can blur together, and your own needs slide to the bottom of the list. Respite care can help you get a real break.
Taking a break is not giving up. It is how you keep going. The National Institute on Aging notes that caregiving is demanding for both the caregiver and the person getting care, and that it can strain even very strong people [1]. That is where respite care comes in.
What respite care is
Respite care is short-term care for the person you look after, so you can rest, travel, run errands, or spend time with other people. It can last a few hours or up to several weeks at a time [1].
The help can come from family, friends, volunteers, or paid professionals [1]. It can happen in a few kinds of places. At home, a trained aide, volunteer, or relative stays with your loved one in a setting they already know. At an adult day center, your loved one spends the day in a supervised group program, often with meals and activities. In a care facility, your loved one has a short stay while you travel, rest, or recover from your own illness [1].
Before you start looking, think about what kind of break would help most. Is it one free afternoon each week to see a friend or go to your own doctor? Is it a few days each month to sleep? Or is it a full week away for a family event? Knowing your goal makes it easier to pick the right kind of help.
Start with the people you already know
Many caregivers say they wish they had asked family and friends for help sooner [1]. Asking can feel hard. You may not want to be a burden, or you may think no one else can do it “right.” But people often want to help and simply do not know how.
The NIA suggests a few ways to make asking easier. Start with small requests. Send a text or email if asking face to face feels awkward. Match tasks to what each person is good at. Be honest about what you need, and try not to take a “no” personally [1].
For example, imagine a brother who lives far away. He may not be able to help every week. But he might fly in for a few days so you can take a real vacation. A neighbor might sit with your loved one one afternoon a week. You can say: “I am running low on energy. Could you stay with Mom on Thursday afternoons for two hours this month?”
Find respite care near you
When family and friends cannot cover what you need, outside help can fill the gap. A few national tools can point you to local options.
The ARCH National Respite Locator is a searchable list of respite services, such as home care agencies and community programs, in your state and local area. ARCH does not provide care itself, and its list is not complete. Being listed does not mean ARCH endorses a provider, and ARCH does not check providers’ backgrounds, so it is up to you to ask about experience, training, and background checks [2]. ARCH also suggests starting with your State Respite Coalition or Lifespan Respite Program if your state has one [2].
The Eldercare Locator is a free public service of the Administration for Community Living. You can call or text 1-800-677-1116 to be connected with local services for older adults and their families, such as your Area Agency on Aging [3].
If you care for a Veteran, call the VA Caregiver Support Line at 1-855-260-3274, Monday to Friday, 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. ET [4]. VA’s Program of Comprehensive Assistance for Family Caregivers includes respite care among its services for those who qualify [4].
Tru-Tips: Line up a respite provider before you hit a crisis. ARCH suggests using a provider for planned breaks first, so your loved one gets to know them. Then, if you get sick or have an emergency, a familiar person is ready to step in.
Ask how it can be paid for
Cost tends to be the biggest worry, and the answer depends on your situation. Help from a friend, relative, or volunteer may cost nothing. Paid services are usually billed by the hour, day, or week [1].
Most private health insurance does not cover respite care. Medicaid may help pay in some cases, and some long-term care insurance plans may cover it [1]. ARCH notes that some state Medicaid waiver programs may cover emergency respite, so it is worth asking [2].
If your loved one gets Medicare hospice care, short-term inpatient respite care can be covered when the hospice team decides it is needed and arranges it. You may pay 5% of the Medicare-approved amount [5]. The NIA notes that Medicare covers most costs for up to five days in a row of this kind of respite in a hospital or skilled nursing facility [1]. Rules can differ by plan and program, so ask the hospice team or your plan what applies to you.
You can say: “I need a few days of rest. What respite options do we have, and what will we have to pay?”
Questions to ask a respite provider
Before you hand over care, even for an afternoon, it helps to ask some clear questions. These can help you feel more at ease:
- “How do you train and screen your staff?”
- “Can you handle my loved one’s needs, like memory loss, help moving, or medicines?”
- “What does it cost, and what is included?”
- “What happens in an emergency?”
- “Can we try a short visit first?”
Pay attention to how the provider answers, not just what they say. Good providers welcome questions. Before the first visit, write a one-page care sheet. Include medicines, the daily routine, likes and dislikes, things that calm your loved one, and phone numbers for you and the care team. This helps the new helper feel confident and helps your loved one feel safe.
Let’s talk about it
What makes it hardest for you to take a break? If you have used respite care, what is one thing that made it work for your family? Your idea might be exactly what another caregiver needs to hear.
One Tru Step: Write down one hour this week you wish you had free. Then make one call, to the Eldercare Locator or a trusted friend, to ask about covering it.
Sources and further reading
- National Institute on Aging: What Is Respite Care?
- ARCH National Respite Network: Find a Respite Provider
- Eldercare Locator (Administration for Community Living)
- VA Caregiver Support Program
- Medicare.gov: Hospice Care
Sources checked October 15, 2026. General education; individual care and coverage questions require an appropriate professional.
Related Health Hubs
Join the conversation 💬
This is your space. Share a tip that helped you, ask the question you have been wondering about, or cheer on someone going through the same thing. Your comment shows up right away, and no account is needed.
Our house rules (they keep this a feel-good spot): Be kind. Stay on topic. Keep it free of religion, politics, and anything hurtful. Comments that break these rules are removed.
Protect your privacy: Use a first name or nickname, and skip full names, phone numbers, and personal health details.
If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988. In an emergency, call 911.